The mentor who was and wasn’t

The Mentor Who Was and Wasn’t

A Six Heart Virtue Micro Life Practice

I looked up to him; he was a mentor to me. I was hungry to learn, and I worked hard on the farm where I worked summers. I was in my element, and he treated me like a son. Years went by, the bond grew deeper, and I tended the chores with delight. One summer, I wanted some time off to have fun with my friends before school started.

It was a simple request. But it was met with distance, silence, and withdrawal. He cut me off, cold and sharp.

I was confused; it didn’t make sense to me. How could this be? What happened to my rock steady mentor? What did I do wrong?

I was young, with no experience with rejection. It was hurtful; I felt betrayed. Anger and confusion lingered for many years. Trust was lost, and the pain was heavy.

Eventually, I chose to look back from the heart, I applied Compassion, Forgivingness and Understanding.

I did not rewrite history, but my load lighten and peace began to return. My heart opened again.

Applying “The When, Which, How” Method:

When: Old memories surface with a sting—a tight chest, defensive narratives, replaying the scene.

Which: I ask for Understanding to humanize motives (his and mine); A crack opens for Forgiveness to unhook the memory; I hold Compassion for the younger me, and I complete with Appreciation and Humility.

How: Hand to heart. Three slow breaths. I say, “We were both learning.” I whisper, “I release you; I release me.”

Sometimes the load we carry asks for a gentle and true inquiry.

Life companions worth hosting: the Six Heart Virtues: Appreciation, Compassion, Forgiveness, Humility, Understanding, Valor.Try this today: Name the virtue, take one breath, choose one small act that embodies that virtue. Do it.

From The Hum Beneath the Noise (2026).

Practice with us at thesixheartvirtues.com.